Attitude of Gratitude: Can it Make You Happier?
We are lucky enough to live in a world where we can get anything we want with the click of a button. We can ask Alexa what the weather will be, self diagnose with a quick Google search and figure out how to braid hair, clean a gutter or grow your business in a matter of a 6 minute YouTube video. Technology is amazing. It can also be overwhelming. As a society we have been conditioned to compare ourselves to others, strive for perfection and expect instant gratification.
It is incredibly easy to get caught up in the social media loop of highlight reels and think to yourself - I want what they have or I’ll be happy when ... Have you ever caught yourself midday scrolling through your phone mindlessly and then all of a sudden you find yourself on Jessica’s page? You know, the Instagram mom of 3 kids with 6 pack abs, Pinterest worthy meals, a successful work from home business AND her kids are always dressed, clean and picture ready. #whatthehelljessica? #youmademefeelbadjessica
My point is that we constantly compare ourselves to others and are often striving for an unrealistic fantasy of what we think will make us happy. But my friends, comparison is the thief of joy. The way to get your joy back, is through gratitude.
Gratitude is a feeling of appreciation towards something that you are thankful for. Can it change your life? I think so. There is extensive research that indicates gratitude is highly correlated with well being and life satisfaction. This is because when you focus on positive feelings your brain creates happy emotions which can cancel out feelings of anxiety, worry and comparison. Sadly, our brains are hardwired to fixate on the negative instead of the positive. My thought is that this came from a primitive survival mechanism from our ancestors, but studies show that we learn more quickly from negative situations vs. positive ones. So we have to work that much harder to make positive thinking and feeling a habit.
Gratitude goes hand and hand with mindfulness as you are focusing on the present moment and what you have now versus what you don’t have.
I don’t know who said this first, but Oprah said this and I personally believe everything that woman says. “What you focus on expands, and when you focus on the goodness in your life, you create more of it”. If you believe at all in the law of attraction or manifestation, this is precisely it.
In other words, if we think negative thoughts, the universe will deliver negativity. However if we think positive thoughts of love, thankfulness, acceptance, and gratitude - we are letting the universe know this is what we want and are welcoming more of that into our lives.
Are you focusing on the positive or are you focusing on the negative?
Ways “An Attitude of Gratitude” can enhance your life:
Improves life satisfaction and well being
Strengthens quality relationships with loved ones
Improves physical health
Reduces symptoms of depression and anxiety
Increases optimism
Improves immune system
Watch here, for my video blog version, or keep reading for quick realistic ways to implement gratitude into your day so you can experience more JOY.
5 Ways to Incorporate Gratitude Into Your Life
1. 5 Fingers of Gratitude
Preferably at the same time every day so it becomes a habit, count on your 5 fingers things you are grateful for at this moment. (people, places or things - nothing is too small to be grateful for). Once again, Oprah does this every day so it must work. An example of mine this morning were: my favorite cozy blanket, hot cup of coffee, hearing birds as I type, watching my youngest come down the stairs in his cute little Batman underwear and puppy cuddles. Simple yet beautiful reminders that life is good.
2. Express Gratitude to Others
Call or text a friend that you are thinking of and tell them that you appreciate their friendship. Say thank you when someone does something kind. Even better, send a hand written thank you note to someone you’ve been thinking of. It will change your day and theirs!
3. Keep a Gratitude Journal
There is a certain magic that happens when you take pen to paper. List out all the things you are grateful for and make it a daily practice. This is even better to do when you are having a bad day or feeling stressed at work. There are always things to feel grateful for, even in the incredibly tough moments. This is the journal that I use, created by Gabby Bernstein. The pages are beautiful, there are mantras scattered throughout the pages and I love it.
4. Meditate/Pray
Take a few minutes every day to sit in silence and reflect on what you are grateful for. You can try a guided meditation for gratitude or simply sit in the feeling of appreciation for all that you have.
5. Talk About it at Dinner With Your Family
Instilling a practice of gratitude is a powerful tool that will strengthen your family bond. Make it a conversation starter around the table where everyone shares the highlight of their day or one thing they are grateful for.
Additional Resources on Gratitude
TED Talks
David Steindl-Rast: Want to be happy? Be grateful
This 15-minute talk, from “monk and interfaith scholar” David Steindl-Rast, discusses gratitude and lessons for slowing down and appreciating the now. In the talk, Steindl-Rast argues that:
“It is not happiness that makes us grateful but gratefulness that makes us happy”.
Discover the Three Keys of Gratitude to Unlock Your Happiest Life
The science geek in me loves this as Jane Ransom discusses the ability of the brain to change through consistent practice. A professional hypnotist, Jane specializes in the subconscious mind, that hard-to-pin-down part of ourselves that guides our feelings, thoughts and behavior. Emote, Extend,and Exercise to unlock your happiest life.
Guided Meditation
A 6 minute guided meditation by Deepak Chopra on gratitude, forgiveness, and cultivating a positive disposition.
Practicing gratitude invites JOY. It’s not the other way around. Being lucky or happy does not make us grateful. Being grateful invites happiness. My final thoughts on gratitude: It has the power to heal, to energize and to change your life. Why not try to make it a habit for 30 days and notice how your life improves. I’d love to hear from you :)
